The World Ends With Us

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So, Lexy decided she wanted to blow up a town today.

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[20:36:00] Balgorath :

[20:37:03] @ Akanesasusora : XD

[20:37:38] @ SilentHeroMatt : Google chrome? And spongebob, I'd guess? I don't get it.

[20:37:47] @ SilentHeroMatt : Oh, does Chrome freeze a lot?

[20:38:20] @ Akanesasusora : No.

[20:38:27] @ Akanesasusora : In the future, everything is chrome.

[20:41:12] @ SilentHeroMatt : ...That's the joke? Something that sounds like a lame motto?

[20:41:52] @ Akanesasusora : I think it was a law, actually.

[20:42:08] @ Akanesasusora : I don't think I've seen that episode since I was like 10. o-o

[20:42:30] Balgorath : akane

[20:42:34] Balgorath : im declaring war

[20:42:41] @ SilentHeroMatt : Wait, that's not Bikini Bottom in winter? Everything frozen?

[20:42:44] Balgorath : and your assistance is needed

[20:42:56] Balgorath : bikini bottom is tropical

[20:42:58] @ Akanesasusora : What for? o.o

[20:43:16] @ Akanesasusora : That's the future. Hence the whole "In the future..." thing.

[20:43:43] Balgorath : because i want to destroy a town

[20:43:58] Balgorath :

[20:45:22] @ Akanesasusora : o-o

What followed was a frightening look into my psyche and the things that run through my head whenever I hear stuff in the form of a news report.

In downtown today, a young woman was seen shouting "No one shall defy the United Nations of Lexico!" She then proceeded to set fire to a Banana Republic clothing store and a pillow manufacturing facility.

Nobody was harmed in the attack, and the police quickly apprehended the suspect, which was quoted as muttering incoherently "Akane...Juggalo...Gamzee..." repeatedly.

The police are now on the lookout for any accomplices by these names. While no one has stepped up to offer any information for the elusive Akane, millions of people have called the police tip hotline the mysterious Gamzee.

These calls, however, have not brought any useful clues, as the people seem to be speaking in some sort of riddle or code. What follows is a recorded call on the hotline. Some of the contents may disturb you.

Operator- "Police tip line. How can I help you?"
Caller- "Let me tell you...about Homestuck."
Operator- "Is this regarding the bombing today?"
Caller- "It's...a...mother...******'...mIrAcLe."
*Honk honk*
Operator- "I'm sorry, can you repeat that? There seems to be some sort of interference"
*Honk honk, and disturbing laughter follows for the next fifty-three second*

The police have yet to make sense of this disturbance today. The authorities would like to remind you to be on the lookout for strange activity, possibly from cultists that want to tell you about Homestuck. This has been Neil with the local news. Now we go to Bob with sports.

"If I woke up looking like that, I'd just run towards the nearest living thing and kill it." -Master Shake



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